Thursday, September 11, 2008

arranged marrianges VS love marriages

What surprises people is the fact that the independent, self-reliant individuals of Generation-Y often look upon their parents to find suitable matches for them. Finding girl/boy friends is easy, finding a wife/husband is serious business! Reason being that the former is temporary while the latter is a lifetime affair. A wrong decision while choosing a bride/groom would mean being stuck in a bad marriage for life. True, divorce is very much an alternative now, but youngsters realize that they will eventually need a partner in their life.

Love marriage, however romantic and attractive it may seem, does have its demerits. The headstrong youngsters misinterpret their romance of a couple of months as pure, undying love and get married. Living together 24X7 makes them see all the things that they do NOT love each other and they realize that they had never been in love. Seeing your marriage fail right before your eyes is the hardest thing ever, especially when you had thought it would work so well…

On the other hand, an arranged marriage might never work at all. Living with someone you have known only for a few months is something almost unimaginable! Also, you may share nothing in common with your partner, may have nothing to talk about. Imagine having to live like that all your life!! Not only will you be unhappy, but also extremely uncomfortable.

Then there are the rare instances when the professed love is true. In those cases, love marriages work and flourish. Shared dreams come true and happiness knows no bounds. Usually love marriages work for those who are extremely dedicated to their relationship and to each other and who are absolutely sure of their choice.

Why is it that the new generation allow and even seek their parents to not just approve of their choice, but also search for someone who will be compatible with them? The reason is simple. The youngsters have a lot of experience in love and relationships. They know that relationships don't always work. They also know that the only people who really care for them are their parents. Parents will never take any decision that is likely to hurt their children. They know very well what their children desire, but more than that they know what they need! This faith and the knowledge that making this decision for their child will give them great happiness leads a person to ask his/her parents to look for a partner for him/her.

Another less commonly admitted reason of why arranged marriages are on the rise is that if the marriage fails they will have someone else to blame. The always-in-control-of-the-situation youngsters do not like to be wrong. They prefer to say "it's all your fault!".

Whatever be the reason, the youth are more inclined towards arranged marriages now as they seem to be thinking that love marriages are less likely to work. They prefer following their parents', rather than their own instinct now.

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